Basic Training

B A S I C     T R A I N I N G teaches you everything you need to know to succeed in life:

You can get along with anybody if you take a lot of showers together. No matter how bad your haircut is, it always grows back. Even lousy food is delicious if you are really hungry. If you have to, you can eat a meal in five minutes ... or less. Neatness always counts, so make your bed every day. Singing while you walk with a large group of people doesn't feel as silly as you thought it would. Everyone should wear name tags. Guns really DO kill people ... too. The fastest way to accomplish something is not by working as fast as you can, but as steadily as you can. It is not courage that makes ordinary people perform extraordinary deeds. It is the shame of letting down people who are counting on you. Everyone should openly wear the status they've earned. You function better when you can identify the fakes, phonies, and frauds; so learn to trust your judgement. You're never as tired as you think you are ... especially when someone starts yelling at you. Learn to follow instructions by paying attention to details. Clean your tools after you use them, because you never know when you'll need them again. Payday is sweeter when you know you have earned every bit of it. Having someone you trust watching your back makes all things seem possible.