Most Favored Person Status
In the usual course of human events
amidst the common anonymity of the teeming masses,
a select few individuals deserve
the honorable distinction of
for a multitude of excellent reasons
and not a few idiosyncratic affinities.
This designation grants priority of access,
seniority of attention, and accelerated gratification.
This tribute confers exceptional tolerance,
lenient forbearance, and willing accommodation.
Due to your charming habits and attractive traits,
your friendly methods and winning ways,
you are entitled to share your
private thoughts and personal secrets in utter confidence.
This notable accord guarantees
open-hearted affection and open-minded consideration.