-
Weight
-
(in basic, advanced, and specialty training)
-
Hearing
-
(due to explosions and gunfire)
-
Grammatical Vocabulary
-
(by association and neglect)
-
IQ Points
-
(by interaction and misuse of brainpower)
-
Fashion Sense
-
(by adherence to uniformity)
-
Civilian Credit Rating
-
(due to miserly salary and niggardly benefits)
-
Constitutional Rights
-
(reserved in discretionary abeyance)
-
Sleep
-
(due to obligations of assigned duty)
-
Privacy
-
(by a multitude of connections and affiliations)
-
Hair
-
(by friction and the absence of a competent barber)
-
Basic Hygiene
-
(due to duty schedule and assigned environment)
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-
Weight
-
(as Permanent Party in a TO&E unit)
-
Vocal Volume
-
(due to counseling by the score or dozen)
-
Rote Memory Skills
-
(because you must be able to think faster than you can write)
-
Arcane Jargon and Slang
-
(because the profession of arms is both an art and a
science)
-
Affinity for (inedible) Starch
-
(in everything but your diet)
-
Ability to Win
-
(by fighting hard and
dirty)
-
Right to Carry
-
a really big gun
(and the permission to use it)
-
Ability to Sleep
-
(anytime, anywhere, any way)
-
Instant Comradeship
-
with other malign and suffering strangers
(because misery loves company!)
-
Military-Patterned Sunburn
-
(a mottled arrangement of exposed and unexposed skin from never
being uncovered in the field)
-
Permission to Dress-Up
-
(like GI Joe All of the time!)
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